As I began to navigate this new post Covid time within my daily life, I realized that I had re-created the patterns from my previous life and existence. This would make sense as my patterns are my patterns. Being a doer, it was like I was trying to find someway to accomplish even without the ability to accomplish. Did I get my meditations in, did I do qigong, did I rest, did I do laying down breathing practices? Did I lay on the healing mat? Did I lie in the sun? Did I lay on the grass? Did I eat properly? Did I do my healing bath? Did I take my vitamins? A sick life can certainly be a busy life. But within this seemingly open day I now had crowded it with a whole new set of accomplishments. The sick person‘s version of accomplishments. All new ways of searching for fulfillment. Fulfillment that can never be unless there is pure presence within each of these tasks. Eventually a certain lack of satisfaction hit me. A knowing that I had just re-created an old version of doing. It’s like trying to stop time by grasping at the air. Nothing to hang onto. No ability to control. Again a lesson in letting go. Only pure presence can fill that hole that I’m trying to fill. The doing mind is insatiable. So I let go again and again and again and allow the day and unfolding to surprise me with its spontaneous gifts. Knowing that each day is perfect how little or more I do. Did I find joy? Was I present? These are the greatest accomplishments I could hope for in a day.